The life of the dull and boring

I see stars and skies floating by me when im sitting there and thinking that should b me.  Wondering when am i gunna have some fun times in my life. Even little kids have more fun than i do and thats a damn shame smh. I cant take the pressure of not being a 18 year old and living life like a housewife a grandma or a boring ass person that have no life at all. Just wishing and hoping that there comes a time where i can go to non stop parties everyday and i wont have to answer to anyone my life is my life. I really hope that one day my life changes but for now its gunna stay the same smh. I really wanna make a change but thats not gunna happen any time soon. He loves he loves me not is the words i keep saying to myself