Be Real to me

The time that we spend with each other i never knew you was this shallow. Lying and being deceiving is not the way to be real. Saying you love me and every other girl is not being real. Whispering to me that you want me and only me when you calling another girl is not being real. I cant stand the way you look at me anymore. The lies and the passion isn't there like it use to be because of one lie. All the lies you tell add up and turns you into a monster maybe its you i should thank because if you didn't lie to me i wouldn't know what real feels like from another guy. The type of people that cant be true are the people i don't want in my life anyway cause if i cant trust you there are no reason for you to be in my life anyway. Sometimes i wish you would get run over by a train, a car, get thrown out of a window, get mauled by a tiger or extremely large blood thirsty animal. The things that i did for you and you betrayed me in the worst way. This is why i cant hold down a relationship without cheating because i think that all guys are the same and always will cheat. So I continue to cheat and mess up a good thing because I'm afraid they will hurt me. the reason i cant trust any guy i get involved with because you messed me up physically and mentally. I pray that one day a girl that you call your girlfriend do to you what you did to me and worse. But then again i will never stoop down to your level and seek revenge or become you. I want to become better and the bigger person that's why I pray that god sends me someone that is 100% not like you. I love myself too much for it to become tainted. The things that i wanna do to you will make you cry if i ever told you.  I love you sooo much though because for letting me go through this experience  because i really appreciate it so much. There will become a time when i get my prince charming but i rather be alone than unhappy because i can do bad all by myself.